New and Improved

Having invested over $1.6M in upgrading their stadium, Gaeta FC would like to announce the latest refurbishment of their home stadium, The Dome. This improvement will address recent problems with regards to sell-out crowds and will thusly encourage attendance of league games by a much larger audience. This latest upgrade will increase the stadiums capacity to 20,000. With a greedy smile on his face a prominent executive for Gaeta FC was reported as saying "this upgrade will increase earnings for the club and ensure that all executives receive a Ferrari as part of their salary package".

BRAP2 CROWNED NUCLEAR CUP CHAMPIONS

BRAP2 have been crowned Nuclear Cup champions of the second season of the Nuclear Cup with an impressive 5-1 win over The Units, the reigning champions.  Despite not being favorites at the start of the season - BRAP2 have proven all their critics wrong and dominated the second season of the Nuclear Cup, winning both the minor and major premierships.  The  BRAP2 manager, after the win, loudly and cryptically proclaimed to the world, "For all those who thought we couldn't do it - well - Fuck You, I'm Anteater!!!"  Exactly what this means will no doubt be debated for centuries to come.

Nuclear Cup Final excites the world!!

World temperatures have risen by an average of 10 degrees this week as the world's population fails to contain it's excitement.
Can the Units defend their title- or will it be BRAP2 who are crowned supreme champions of the world? All will be revealed Wednesday. The previous match between the two teams was a tightly contested 1-0 win to Units. The Final promises to be just as nail-biting.

In other news, The Units fans are happy today, as the team now seems certain to finish 6th and avoid automatic relegation, despite a 5-2 loss today.

The mighty BRAP2 has used it finances to purchase 3 new players to help them out for the end of the season and beyond. The sale of Nicolas Chambonnet, former star goalie gave rise to the need to purchase a new trainee. Danny Bundy from the USA is a future hot prospect already being an inadequate defender and having inadequate set pieces on top of passable keeping. To strengthen the defensive line Archie Warendorf is a player to be reckoned with, being a 4.5 star defending in passable form he also has a great head on his shoulders to be effective when corners arise. Last but not least a surprise purchase was midfielder Miguel Ángel Pinza who will strengthen the middle for the BRAP2 organisation.

Green Loraxes Bundled Out of Nuclear Cup Finals

The Green Loraxes have shockingly been eliminated from the finals of the Nuclear Cup. More Fire! took the last finals spot with a superior goal difference. Green Lorax management have made official complaints to Nuclear Cup organisers (pictured) which has so far fallen on deaf ears. According to an anonymous source high up within the Green Lorax management, the Green Loraxes are considering taking their complaints to the UN High Commision, and may even try to bring a charge of war crimes against More Fire! and The Nuclear Cup. An official statement by Green Lorax management has strongly condemned the management of the Nuclear Cup. "We feel the Nuclear Cup is losing it's long tradition. How is it that teams like More Fire! and Bluthenthal da 3 can make the finals and the Loraxes miss out!? This is a clear indication that the Nuclear Cup is intrinsically flawed, and requires an overhaul!". This attitude is unlikely to be tolerated by Nuclear Cup organisers, with swift retribution likely. Green Loraxes have also denied being sore losers.

Bud helps Units to break drought!

Two goals from legend Charlie "Bud" Tingwell has got The Units over the line for their first league win for a while- giving hope to the fans that the Units might avoid relegation. However, Bud says: "We still have a lot of hard work to do to stay up in Division V. If everyone follows my lead, we might just survive the season."