Fips relaxes in retirement

The legendary Fips Hanus has been seen relaxing on holiday in the Bahamas. A big hit with the ladies, Fips has caused quite a stir at the resort. The passable keeper has adapted to civilian life quickly, starting up an all-you-eat restaurant, where Fips has guaranteed all dishes are personally tested and approved by himself. However, so far the restaurant has surprisingly yet to record a profit.

I miss you all guys!!!

Hi everybody!
I don't know why today I'm feeling really nostalgic!
I looked all the pictures and short movies of my days in Melbourne and I remembered the great time spent with you guys!
Thank you!

Alba

PS. Well done Andy...you did a great job with the Wildman plug-in!

Units do their bit for stagnant economy

The Units have bought the first of a new batch of defensive trainees, 21 year old Romanian prodigy Gavril Câmpeanu, for $3.4 million. Gavril is already a brilliant playmaker, formidable set-piece taker, and is set to become The Units first genuine multiskilled superstar. Gavril was injured during his league match on Sunday, but according to club doctors he will be fit in time to commence defence training when The Units switch from keeper training in a couple of weeks.

Whilst many of the Units critics have questioned the wisdom of spending $3.4 million on an injured 21-year old trainee, club management pointed out the cost is largely offset by a $900 gift from Kevin Rudd. Also, the Club is expecting a "stimulus package", which medical staff say may not help Gavril's injuries directly, but "should at least cheer him up a bit".

A sad and sorry day for Quinn Kings as More Fire! beats the Series V.164 favourites

The boys of More Fire! have outdone themselves once again, after beating the clear favourites of their Series to win today's match 2-1. This comes as a shock to the Kings, as their unprecedented loss this season means it is now unclear whether they will be automatically accepted into Division IV, for the fourth time. Meanwhile, the entire team of More Fire! were enjoying celebratory after-game drinks, after 'mooning' their way out of the Burning New arena, clearly satisfied with their result. But the win did not come without an inevitable loss, as one of their up and coming star midfielders, Fernando Flores twisted his ankle during the battle, having to watch the rest of the game from the sidelines. The management of More Fire! said that they would supply the boys with extra spirits during their training sessions from now on, and also provide extra budget for alternative training methods and medicines such as shiatsu, bear-wrestling and wife-carrying contests which have seemed to increase the strength, mobility and stamina of the players all-round resulting in today's spectacular win. The management of the Kings team were unavailable for comment, but a close source revealed that most of the boys had fallen quite ill after consuming a whole lot of Chinese custard buns the night before.